Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Speak Like an Australian Day

Today, January 26th, is Australia day, a day when Aussies celebrate the arrival in 1788 of the First Fleet of eleven convict ships from the UK.  The day the British flag was raised and occupation of the eastern half of our continent began.  England’s largest jail was born.

Now, whilst this may be a minor event on the planetary calendar, not coming close to the Superbowl or Macey’s Christmas Parade, I still think the world should pause, reflect and celebrate with the inhabitants of the world’s largest island.

If Disney’s reinterpretation of the Pirate genre can give birth to ‘Speak like a Pirate Day’ then surely something as monumental as Australia Day should garner a similar response.  Therefore I think this holiday should be renamed, ‘speak like an Aussie day.’

To help you all get in the swing of it I shall endeavour to give you the heads up on the most useful Aussie expressions and pronunciations.  Now any of you who watched that movie with Meryl Streep where she declared, “a dingo ate my baby” are at a disadvantage…we really don’t sound like that.

First things first, an Australian will tell you they come from Austraya, note the word has a silent L.

When meeting an Austrayan the native will greet you with, G’day mate, which is the universal acknowledgment of your existence and acceptance as friend rather than foe.

If he offers you a ‘snag’ do not be offended or concerned, he is merely offering you a sausage, usually from the barbie.

The average Austrayan will pepper his language with words that may appear profane to the uninitiated. For example if he calls you a bastard it is a usually a term of endearment, unless you happened to let slip some unfortunate information about your parentage.  Oh bugger, denotes that something has clearly gone wrong. If an Aussie were to drive into the back of your vehicle with his Ute (a car with a tray on the back instead of rear passenger seats and a trunk) his first response would usually be ‘oh bugger.’

Austrayans have many affectionate terms for those they love, mate, cobber, and dag.  Dag being reserved for the times when your mate is being stupid. If you spill beer down yourself and make an Aussie laugh he may well call you a dag.  Should you hasten to Wikipedia for a translation you may be insulted to discover the word dag denotes a fly blown, shit encrusted piece of wool hanging below a sheeps butt, however, to an Australian it is an acknowledgment that you are just plain stupid.

Clothing here has it’s own names.  At the beach, the male of the species can be seen wearing budgie smugglers, you may call them a banana hammock or perhaps swimming trunks.  Dacks are pants and underdacks, are obviously underwear.  Women have been known to wear frocks and men singlets rather than wife beaters.  A skivvy is a roll neck jumper and thongs go on your feet.

As well as their being generic words recognized the country over, each state has its own nuances.  For example should you meet an Austrayan who ends every sentence with ahy, thus turning every comment into a question, you can be assured you are in the company of a Queenslander.  Should your tame Aussie keep telling you everything is grouse then you are the proud owner of a Victorian.

Having lived here for many years I have learned to understand and even mimic the Aussie so well that I have blended into my habitat. I grew up in the UK but became an Austrayan citizen as soon as time allowed, there is no where else in the world I would choose to call home, despite the drought, flooding and kookaburras who seem greatly amused by something in the trees outside my bedroom window at 5.30 in the morning.  Although I do like Paris, maybe I could do Paris. Hmmm.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

A Reader's Review

I have been very slack of late in updating my blog.  Life got in the way. We are in the midst of renovating our laundry and I have been madly editing a novel called 'Male Order,' about a girl who accidentally becomes a pimp to a male prostitute. 

Meanwhile, Happy Birthday, Nancy Tobin, has been getting some rave reviews from readers on Goodreads including this one posted by Mrs. Missive.

Let me start of by saying that this book shocked the heck outta me. Aside from the A-hole hubby and the overwhelming desire to off herself, I had a scary similar life situation to Nancy(our newly 40 heroine).

Nancy has a job she hates, a life she doesn't know how to change and the sudden interest of a hot college stud named Jake.

Jake decides he just wants to make Nancy smile. Well what better way to make a woman smile than boinking her brains out? Hell, sounds like the right idea to me.

Now I know you are thinking, "Hold up! She's married!" But trust me a few pages of her husband and you'd boink the hottie too.

I felt a real connection with the characters in this book, and I could not put it down until I found out if Nancy got the HEA she deserved. And I have to say the ending sentence is the absolute best I have ever read. I've never quoted the end of a book, because I'm not a spoiler sally, but this ending is beyond quotable.

The only problem I had in this book for awhile were Nancy's waffling on her belief that Jake could want her. This breaks my cardinal rule of, "if you are boinking a hottie, you aren't aloud to have body issues". However Nancy's growth as a character, and the inner strength that is brought out in her completely redeemed her for me.

This was a true spicy romance novel. Loved it. So glad I won the copy, highly recommend to erotica and romance readers alike. 5 stars.